Scary Home Inspection Finds For Spooky Season

It’s spooky season again, so it’s time to talk about some of the creepy or alarming things home inspectors run across when inspecting homes (cue the horror movie music). Sometimes we find dangerous conditions that are genuinely scary. Other times it’s creepy critters, or gross, unidentifiable substances that feel like the plot of a horror movie. And sometimes, homeowners with a sense of humor like to leave little surprises in hidden spots just to keep us on our toes, like a fake hand in the freezer, or a mannequin in the closet.

Then there was that Realtor who went viral for putting Michael Myers from Halloween in all of his listing photos. Brilliant. I’m not sure how that encourages people to buy the house, but he sure got a lot of eyes on it.

Anyway, here are some scary home inspection finds from the field that we hope you never find in your house:

The M Word

As home inspectors, we can’t say “mold” when we’re doing a home inspection because you have to test that substance before you can officially say it’s mold, but since we’re not official here at Upon Closer Inspection, that there is MOLD. And it’s BLACK. There’s a whole lot of it under the house because the hot water lines got damaged somehow and have been leaking under there, and there is black mold soupy sludge festering in the crawlspace and making a nice spore field all over the wood. So that’s good for everyone’s health.

This is the kind of thing that you hate to see, because these folks have been unknowingly living with this for a while, and will now have to fix it before they can move out. That’s why having a seasonal or home health inspection periodically — not just when you’re buying or selling a home — is a good idea. So you can find out about things that are going wrong with your home while you’re living there.

The Beast

Nope! If this were me, I would nope it right out of there. Not Inspector Brian, though. He went in for a close-up, so he could let them know they had a black widow in the garage and should call pest control. That man is a hero. That pile on the garage floor? Those are all spiders. I’ll be right back. I have to take a shower and burn my house down.

Fire in the Hole

First, let me explain the pictures. In the first image, you’re looking at the opening to the crawl space in which the water heater is located. In the second image, you’re looking up the crawl space at the water heater, and finally, we’ve crawled to the top of the water heater to see the issue, which is that the flue pipe is disconnected. So you can see why this issue might have gone undetected by the homeowners. Because you have to be Harry Potter or maybe a gymnast to get up there. Nonetheless, there is combustible air, i.e. carbon monoxide, merrily blowing into the house, unbeknownst to all, which is super dangerous, and very scary.

Poof